A Questionnaire About Me
I have dis extremely long questionnaire, all about myself, so, don't miss it!!
---IN ONE TRY..TYPE YOUR NAME WITH YOUR---
-----------------DESCRIBE------------------
-----------------WHAT IS------------------
-----------------YOU PREFER------------------
-----------------DO YOU------------------
------------IN THE PAST MONTH DID YOU/HAVE YOU--------------
-----------------HAVE YOU EVER------------------
-----------------THE FUTURE------------------
-----------------OPPOSITE/SAME SEX------------------
-----------------NUMBER OF-----------------
Part 2
----------------FAVORITES---------------
----------------RIGHT NOW------------------
---------------IN THE LAST 24 HRS------------------
---------------DO YOU BELIEVE IN--------------
--------FRIENDS AND LIFE------------------
-------------------CURRENT-------------------
--------------DO I+HAVE I EVER----------------
---------------LOVE AND STUFF----------------
..............ARE YOU A..................
................LAST+ (THANK GOD)...............
Dee
As I sit here thinking about this place
I couldn't help a grin
As I am grounded I won't leave no trace
I couldnt help a sin
I still breathe my words
As my words are my only freedom
I still sing my chords
As chords are the cure of boredom
I barely touch my skin
As my skin is all scraping
I would fail not to fit in
As I've all been escaping
My eyes are rose red
I skip crying if u know why
My lies are to be wed
I rip myself to go there and fly
It's me beneath all the hatred
And I drink each of the poisoned
It's me living as I am wasted
And I wink at each of the sickened
I grin as if it's forever
For all the moments are surreal
I sin as if I never
For all the surreal is never to reveal
=========================
100% By Dee, Dedicated to Gorgie
Dear no one,
(A huge breath exhaled...)
Ok, we're heading on to d next level here, and if u've already read all the amazingly "boring" content here in dis amazingly plain blog, well, u should've had dis image or hypothetic thoughts about me already, IF..u read ALL and u DIG ALL..lolsz.
So, dis next poem of mine is called "The Surreal Moments", well, pretty obvious though, as I've always been dealing with surreal moments in my whole entire F-ing life. Well, at least, all the so-called Surreal Moments had started when I first "met" dis Surreal Friend called Gorgie. You know why I call her Surreal? coz she happened and happens to be my Imaginary Friend. Weww, yesz, dat sounds kinky and psychotically insane, but I'm still fully normal to say dat I AM NORMAL still.
Well, never try to judge my psychological behaviour side. Having an imaginary friend feels normal now. Well, I used to be a bit depressed though, coz I thought I was losing it. But then as time goes by, we really could manage to be real good friends, in a real weird way. Well, she was almost everything to me, but now she only remains as my shadow.
It's up to all of you now, if you wanna judge me as a person who has dis F-ing MPD (Multiple Personality Disorder) or merely as a plain psychotic chick, I don't care and I won't care. I feel happy and glad enough to be myself, coz in sum extraordinary ways, I feel gifted as well as cursed. And..last but definitely not the least, I know it sounds lame, but I'm so happy dat I have dis blog of mine, where I could spit all my F-ing thoughts to not only myself, but to all of you. And I sure hope dat u all r still willing to follow the updates of it, as I will always update it everyday. Until then, I'm out.
Dee
Let's write poetry, Dee
Though in it there's no fee
Though only you n me can see
Let it be, let 'em envy
Can a kiss melt a heart
Turn a street savage into a bard
Longing for cuddles n a hearth
Or else it gets frozen and hard
Yes I see God in me, O God!
Powerless, indifferent, insolent
To be born, die, reborn potent
Heaven n Hell in me, O God!
Let's write poetry, Dee
As poets are sincere and free
Let's breathe words, let 'em flee
Only then we'll forever tarry
--------------------------------------
20/10/04, By Matazeno, dedicated to Dee
Dear no one,
Humm, it's gonna be a li'l different dis time at dis moment, 'coz d poem didn't come from me, but a very good friend of mine. He's one of the most beautiful unreachable souls I've ever known. For I adore every single thing about him, pretty much a mirror to myself.
All of a sudden, he gave me dis piece of paper with his writing on it. Apparently, he just made me a poem, which is a really rare thing to do..lolsz..and d poem came out without a title, well..he has dis different style in making poems, he's much much better coz he always makes poetry with Classic English style, while I always use the contemporary and so much slangs..wait 'til u read his Short Stories, u'll be amazed! lolsz, he's my mentor, my great partner, my so-called "Babeh"..lolsz..I'm glad I could be his "Sista", and I couldn't stop saying thanx when he made me dis poem, and I told him dat I would put d poem in my blog, then he gave me dis gorgeous angelic smile and a wink.
When he said, "Heaven n Hell in me, O Lord!", well, it's true..lolsz..I had to quote dat for ya. So, dats it for now, 'til then, I'm out.
Dee
I need no memories to retrieve
I've reached the end of the beginning
I'm stuck already no ways of returning
Wrong choices pointless regretness
I'm a natural born stupid
The lackest lack of awareness
I'm a natural lost cupid
It's someone I'll never ever be
It's the only fate I could never see
It's something I'll never ever get
It's the only thing I could never forget
Am I worth all this?
Is it meant to be?
Pointless words I could only say
It's sad to know that this is the only way
For something that's already IT..
For something that's meant to be..
For something that's worth it..
And I know I'm worth it..
It's just one of those things.......
-----------------------------------------
100% By Dee
Dear no one,
Okie, so, let's see what we got here, ahh, another miserable poem about myself called "Is It Meant To Be?" Well, gez it's pretty obvious though..It's a matter of rage, that rushed into my blood and vein, what else? It's about my love-life and the pityness..
Oh, here we go again. So, u know I've always felt weird about myself. Especially when it comes to romance, it's like I've always been dumped by love, love has never come to me gently, and it has always ended sad, tragic, and ironic. Does love hate me or what? lolsz..
Well, despite all, maybe I'm worth all dis misery and pain, and maybe it is meant to be..dats y I made dis poem. I could never get what I want, and dats it, end of story, lolsz..
Well, gotta repeat the last line of my poem, "it's just one of those things..." lolsz..until then, I'm out.
Dee
Lolsz..I took dis from one of the cheesy goth sites..well, don't take it seriously will ya..I'm outtie.
Dee
A pair of white wide wings came
A fair colored ring stood there with name
Angel of Flaws..
Angel of Claws..
Encountering all the odds
Mesmerizing all the bods
Beneath all expectations
Need not explanations
Never know what not to do
Or even say I do
I'd rather skip all the unknown
For the same wings have flown
I've flown all over
You've caught me with cover
I've been escaping karma
But never with enough drama
Someone has cast a spell on me
I've never thought that I might be
A flawless person full of flaws
It's a crowdless tragedy without pause
For the uncountable times
I've wept and crept
For the unhearable rhymes
I've slept and left
This is all nonsense
I can only make essence
Of the thing u called flaws
Taste the bitterness
Taste the sweetness
I couldn't ask for more
It's you that I adore
With the claws I careless
I've given a scratch..
A sratch of flaw to the flawless..
------------------------------------
100% By Dee, dedicated to Chillo-Z
Dear no one,
I'm back..lolsz..
So, here goes my next poem, called "A Scratch of Flaw to The Flawless"..lolsz..I can't stop blushing myself when it comes to this one..err..can we skip?? Lolsz, hell no, ok ok I'll spit it out to y'all..
Actually, it's been a while ago, when I jz broke up wit my ex-bf --details of ex-bf have been skipped--..lolsz..dis guy called Chillo-Z came up to me, he rushed into me when I wasn't even ready..And everything went out wild and great..and SNAPP!! We got into dis odd chemistry together. Humm, well, never ask me about now..dats another different thing 
So, umm, I made dis poem 4 him, when I had to tell all d truth about myself, he was d person I could really talk with, and since we had such great thingsz in common, so I made dat poem and dat poem tells how much I adored him, and dat I felt small and worthless, coz he used to be almost perfect and flawless to me..though we both had flaws and still have flaws, but we considered flaws as flawless..lolsz..we never had such serious relationship though, it was all only 4 fun, at least we decided to make it dat way, and it was all mutual.
Dats it...well, gez am pretty tired now, gonna get sum rest, I'll work on dis blog latersz. Until then, I'm outtie guysz
Dee
A Story of The Ignored
He's created by hands and love
Not fully furnished
He's filled with all the good insides
Not entirely finished
He lives up there, all dark, pitch black
While everybody lives below, all full-colored
It's not the colors he lack
But it's the last thing he ever asked
Feel his tears when he cries, never
Feel his chills when he tries, ever
He's trembling when he knows not
Of how it feels to get that feelings a lot
He falls in love with a dream
He tries but he knows he lacks
Not even when they all redeem
It's not against anything but facts
He falls in the chemistry unknown
He falls in the history unknown
For all the goods and bads of himself
He couldnt do nothing without hurting
As he tried to be good as the behalf
He could do everything without taunting
And as the ultimate sacrifice
He will remain invisible, all in pitch black
As to the loved one he lingers
He will remain visible, never going back
He is remain loved..to death
As he lives still...
------------------------------------------
100% By Dee, Dedicated to Ed.
Dear no one,
Ok, I watched dis old time favorite Tim Burton's movie,
Edward Scissorhands, well, I watched it a long time ago, so I kinda missed it. And hell yeah, I loved every moment of it. Well, I do adore Johnny Depp, but it's more than that, he could bring the depth of the character itself..which made me cry..sob, sob..I really LOVE Tim Burton's work on dis flick, gez it's like his BEST work, though Nightmare Before Christmas is also one hell of a goth movie, lolsz...
So, I got carried away wit d story, and blv it or not, I cried my tears, coz..4 sum reasons, Ed is soo me, d inside..what i'm sayin' iz..lolsz..so I made a poem about him..and dats it..If you guysz still don't get it, u gotta watch the movie first, then u'll tell..
Okiesz..I'm still workin' on the updates for dis blog, no worries, I'll try to make it always up 2 date until then..I'm out.
Dee
A deep breath exhaled, as I finally managed to make dis blog as d replacement for d 1st one which was totally fucked up..I hope dis blog lives longer than d 1st one, I won't bear anymore errors or whatsoever, hope dis is a pay-off..
Explanation 4 d 1st poem I made, called "The First Entrance To Nothing", well, it's truly nothing, lolsz..As I refered it to d breakthrough from self imprisonment, dat I could call myself as a so-called half-free-gothic cupid, lolsz..I wish..
Ok, ok, get serious
Well..let's hope 4 another discovery. Until then...I'm out.
Dee
The Heart Is Broken
It is that I fear the most
To become unknown again
It is always when I'm lost
To reunite with pain
I sigh, I cry, I sigh
Never when I'm high
I weep, I sleep, I creep
Always when I'm deep
I live in a half
Never myself
I live in full
Always to fool
I'm all open
The voice is spoken
I'm all frozen
The heart is broken
100% By Dee
Dear no one,
I made dis poem a while ago when I was in d classroom in d middle of my college lesson. Ahem, okiesz, I'm tryin' to recall d situation at dat time..well, I actually found dis poem in my notebook, it was a scrap and barely seen..
Ok, I was obviously devastated when I wrote dis poem, and it ain't nothin' new coz I've always been like dat 
. And the main problem had and has always been about my love-life or myself 
which started to get a li'l bit overrated and booooringg...
Dats all from me now..I'll be back with more poems, 'til then, I'm out.
Dee
Finally.. (breath exhaled) I've accomplished the editing of dis so-called gothic online journal of mine, well..haven't totally finished it yet, but at least I've reached most of it. I used to have dis blog sumwhere but I couldn't stand the errors dat I encountered
Okay, dis journal basically tells about my sick thoughts and as d media for my miserable poems and my gothic self-pics, coz I do need sum space to let it all out..So, for those of u who like contemporary gothic poems and artsy gothic pics, hopefully u'll love dis journal.
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